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September 15, 2005 at 12:00 AM
lol@tormenting ur readers. yep, u have me addicted to this story! their relationship is dangerous in the future? will we be seeing the friendship with sue develop more? I enjoyed this chapter, especially the way you wrote about Magneto and his double standards.
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September 15, 2005 at 12:00 AM
yea! loved tha chapter loved the way that jo is making a point about the frail bones but it would be fun to let victor go once in a while keep up the great writing and hope to see another chapter up form you soon!
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September 12, 2005 at 12:00 AM
hiya, just to say I luv your fanfic, its really addictive! I especially love all the detail that has gone into it, i'm glad its not just (like a lot of stuff on this site!) please update it soon I wanna know what happens next! I really like the character of Joviana, shes smart. I hope Victor loves her (i'm a sucker for romance)keep up the good work!
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September 12, 2005 at 12:00 AM
hi again loved this chapter espically the knee to the groin at the end to really finish him off keep up the wonderful writing and hope to see another chapter up from you soon!
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September 10, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Yay! Joviana kicks super mutant ass!
You know, one thing that always irritated the hell out of me about the X-men was the lack of ordinary human characters. I wanted to see the sper people deal with the not so super people- their dentists, their cousins, the pizza delivery guy. There was this school full of people who were supposed to be all for humans and mutants living in peace, but they seemed to have nothing much to do with humans. Never made sense to me...
I love you heroine's take on costumed adventurers from a civilian viewpoint. Has she had any luck in getting Doom to "mainstream" Latveria's mutants into actual productive citizens. They can't all have martial applications to their powers anyway, right?
I do feel like Magneto's character and motivations are kind of lacking in the story. I never thought he was a very good politician, but he's supposed to be good at tactics, and kidnapping Doom's fiance in order to find out what makes her tick seems really kind of stupid. Y'know, kind of like not stockpiling supplies in structures that are going to be used as emergency shelters...
Totally enjoying the story, and still waiting for the kiss and make up part after the little lover's tiff a few chapters back.
You know, one thing that always irritated the hell out of me about the X-men was the lack of ordinary human characters. I wanted to see the sper people deal with the not so super people- their dentists, their cousins, the pizza delivery guy. There was this school full of people who were supposed to be all for humans and mutants living in peace, but they seemed to have nothing much to do with humans. Never made sense to me...
I love you heroine's take on costumed adventurers from a civilian viewpoint. Has she had any luck in getting Doom to "mainstream" Latveria's mutants into actual productive citizens. They can't all have martial applications to their powers anyway, right?
I do feel like Magneto's character and motivations are kind of lacking in the story. I never thought he was a very good politician, but he's supposed to be good at tactics, and kidnapping Doom's fiance in order to find out what makes her tick seems really kind of stupid. Y'know, kind of like not stockpiling supplies in structures that are going to be used as emergency shelters...
Totally enjoying the story, and still waiting for the kiss and make up part after the little lover's tiff a few chapters back.
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September 9, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Chap13. You really like flashbacks a lot, don't you? I did end up checking this story out on ff.net, and I'm not sure which I think is better, when the story goes in chronologically straight or when it winds around and reveals the characters slowly. I did like how she handled Toad: I mean, come on, he's TOAD. Taking him seriously is the first sign of mental illness in a fic writer. I look forward to seeing the reprecussions that ensue from this for Jovi and Doom, but don't forget that there was a period of several hours at least where he must have thought she'd betrayed him, paranoid thing that he is. His reaction shouldn't be left by the wayside, unless you want to abandon your duality theme this late in the game.
That aside, I *do* so love her thought processes about the injustice to mutants that Xavier and Magneto both pull off. While X-books do throw in a few helpless victim-type mutants every now and then, for the most part its only so the costumes can save them. They're really lost the sense of hope of the early books... In that vein, you might want to consider what *Doom's* response to mutation in Latveria is. There have to be some mutants there. No doubt he's got something organized and sensible going on, but what?
That aside, I *do* so love her thought processes about the injustice to mutants that Xavier and Magneto both pull off. While X-books do throw in a few helpless victim-type mutants every now and then, for the most part its only so the costumes can save them. They're really lost the sense of hope of the early books... In that vein, you might want to consider what *Doom's* response to mutation in Latveria is. There have to be some mutants there. No doubt he's got something organized and sensible going on, but what?
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September 9, 2005 at 12:00 AM
yea victor has her back happy day! i like the way that jo is a bit of a badass and at the same time a nobel lady keep up the great writing i love this story! :-)
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September 8, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I realize this is a little out of the blue, but I just started to take German, so the thought was on my mind... All of the Romance languages, and many other European languages, have formal and informal forms of the pronoun 'you'. So, in German, you don't address your boss with the informal "du" that you use with your friends, you only use the formal "Sie," even if you're just chatting. Same in Spanish, French, etc. Of course, Latverian is a fictional language, so it can follow whatever grammatical rules are convienient for the writer, but it seems like it wouldn't be outside the realm of possibility for Latverian to have to formal/informal you split. Which brings me to my actual question: IF Latverian does have 'in-/formal you', how is Jovi addressing Doom now? I mean, she's still calling him "my lord" at times even now they're gettin' hitched, so it seems likely that the most diplomatic thing for her to do is just continue using a 'formal you' until he asks her to stop, but she *is* mentally calling him Victor.... Alright, a great deal of that was incredibly random, but I just had the thought and wondered if you had considered it.
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September 7, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Hey Gevaisa!
Look, I've found you here, because when I was not able to learn any more, I started reading "Minion" (as you have not updated any of your other stories!) - and though all the characters and the "Universe" are unfamiliar with me, I enjoyed your style and the story so much that I kept reading - and when ff.net did not offer more, I started searching for more - and that was how I came here. ;-)
Is there more to be found on the net from you?
When will you update anything? Until now, I am reading three stories authored by you - and I am curious about all of them.
Still, the sequence you use in ff.net is - to me - better than the sequence here - with beginning at the first meeting and then going on.
I will try now and go back to my books about biliotherapy and its use in religious education of blind children - which is the subject I will probably have to write my last written test about tomorrow morning from nine to one - and I still don't have a clue on what to write. ;-)
Have a nice day and take care of yourself!
Sincere greetings, awoman
Look, I've found you here, because when I was not able to learn any more, I started reading "Minion" (as you have not updated any of your other stories!) - and though all the characters and the "Universe" are unfamiliar with me, I enjoyed your style and the story so much that I kept reading - and when ff.net did not offer more, I started searching for more - and that was how I came here. ;-)
Is there more to be found on the net from you?
When will you update anything? Until now, I am reading three stories authored by you - and I am curious about all of them.
Still, the sequence you use in ff.net is - to me - better than the sequence here - with beginning at the first meeting and then going on.
I will try now and go back to my books about biliotherapy and its use in religious education of blind children - which is the subject I will probably have to write my last written test about tomorrow morning from nine to one - and I still don't have a clue on what to write. ;-)
Have a nice day and take care of yourself!
Sincere greetings, awoman
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September 6, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Chap 12... While you had my unadulterated support before, my love of Sabretooth divides my loyalties on this chapter. On the one hand, smart, cool-headed original character, taking care of business with only the resources at her disposal in a chapter that's way too short, but on the other hand, the return of the "stupid, murderous, sidekick" Sabretooth, good for hacking and slashing but without two grey cells to rub together. Sigh.... Still, its wonderful to see the damage that intellect and common household appliances can work upon an unsuspecting supervillian. But she still has to take care of Toad....