The Joke's On Batman

Chapter 3

Despair

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He ought to be angry. How could those words make him feel so helpless? You're in the hands of a maniac, he snapped at himself. Tell me one person who doesn't feel helpless in this situation. You're going to die. You know it this time. He is going to amuse himself in his sick way and then kill you.

Batman closed his eyes. Just like Robin, he thought.

"Yoo-hoo...Earth to Batsy." The Joker waved a hand in front of his face. He felt the displacement of air. "You're not zoning out on me, are you? I want you to feel every last thing."

"Go to hell."

The Joker slapped him. "Now that wasn't nice. I'm the victor here. Stop being a sore loser. Isn't this a happy occasion? I finally won. You should be happy for me."

Batman opened his eyes. He stared directly at the Clown. He felt no emotion, and none showed on his face. "Then congratulations."

The Joker rubbed his hands together. "Now, I want to see what you look like behind the mask. Do you wear it because it's comfortable and everyone should wear one, or was your face burned by acid or something?"

The reference to The Princess Bride didn't escape Batman. He noticed it, but he hardly felt that he was required to have a response. When The Joker started self-indulgently quoting comedy, he was in a world of his own and was not to be disturbed.

He winced and forced himself to stay still while The Joker removed his mask. It was always better to do what the madman wanted when he had you at his mercy. He had learned that watching so many of his victims struggle. So many people dead...

The Joker fiddled with the mask-cowl and finally threw it back. "Aha!" He rubbed his chin, staring into Batman's face. "Hey. No wonder you wear that mask." He giggled. "You're a dead ringer for Bruce Wayne. You must've gotten tired of being mistaken on the street. You're a working Joe, right? Some nobody who gets a kick out of flying around in that mask and defeating evildoers? That's why you do it, right?" He cackled. "Probably had some family tragedy." He polished his knuckles on his purple suit. "That's how it gets all of us. The insanity bug." He winked.

Batman didn't respond. First, he had no idea what to say to the fact that The Joker couldn't possibly envision him as Bruce Wayne. His acting had been that good? Secondly, he was trying hard not to rip The Joker's throat out with his teeth for mentioning 'family tragedy'.

"Oh, don't be sore." The Joker clapped him on the shoulder. "I had to see your face eventually, Batsy. Curiosity kills the clown."

"What...are you going to do to me?" Batman asked numbly.

The Joker slapped him, but playfully. "Bad, bad boy! That's a surprise! Can't you wait for Christmas, you naughty little man?"

He looked at the floor. His throat suddenly felt tight. How am I going to tell Alfred? he thought. Then he mentally shook his head. Snap out of it! Someone else is going to have to tell Alfred! Do you really think you're escaping from this? Look what he did to Robin!

Robin...

Batman shut his eyes again, trying to hold back the shameful sting of tears. He resisted the compulsion to drop to his knees. "Alright," he mumbled.

The Joker patted him on the head. "That's better."